Yeah, I was really nervous.
Oh no, I was so nervous I couldn’t believe it.
It was crazy. So long. So many years. And then there I was, waiting. Waiting just a bit more with the whole world on my hands.
Yeah, that was all of my world. And my hands, I kept them with me all the time. There was nothing else. Just me and them.
That was the reason for what I lived untill then. For what I was born. And standing there I couldn’t believe. Oh fuck, that was the day. Gouge away.
And so it was. The lights broke down, the smoke came, everyone around me started to shout and jumped. Raising their hands. And I thought “Fuck, this is it, this is the day, this is now and I’m here!”
And so I jumped, I raised my hands, I shouted the hell out of me. I couldn’t believe a minute of what was happening. And I didn’t care.
I didn’t care if that was a dream or not. If I was just sleeping or if someone was spitting a curse upon me. I really didn’t bother at all.
And the smoke passed away, the lights were just this crazy as I was, as everybody was. The sound bursting into my ears and the rest of everything around me, wow!
They came, that I remember. After I just don’t know, I can try to make an idea if somebody asks. I can try myself out, but I doubt it could be the truth. If it could be what other people say. I can try to recall some of the words like “the road of tar beneath the wheel named extinction”, or something like that, but right now it isn’t really important.
I was so nervous and then there was this calmness, this nothingness, I can say or explain. And suddenly I was not there: I was out of my mind. And there was time ahead. And my hands knew it, they would soon be free.
And fuck, that was good!
Fuck!
Lights down. Smoke. Fury. Hands. Lot’s of dirty hands. Crawling on my neck. You, there. My worship. You, forever there. To blame. To love!














2 Comments
What you wrote made me nervous
Nervous? Welcome to the club.